{2jtab: Movie Review}

Another mash-up in a long list of pop culture suicides; this is the largely inane territory of D.J Caruso’s I Am Number Four, a film that presents itself as X-Men meets Twilight by way of Close Encounters of the Third Kind with a little “Dog the Bounty Hunter” thrown in.  Talk about headache inducing material.  Pulpy doesn’t even begin to describe this last ditch stab to get teenagers into theaters across America.

Written by Alfred Gough & Miles Millar (the money behind "Smallville") and Marti Noxon (producer on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer"), the film never leaves the realm of television material.  This young-adult geared sci-fi actioneer is about a group of extraterrestrial teens, led by pretty-boy flavor of the week Alex Pettyfer, hiding out on Earth from tattooed alien bounty hunters with lizards on leashes…and other “cooooool” stuff.

Yippee.

All of this zippy material and lighting bolt wielding doesn’t matter, though.  I Am Number Four (of NINE!!!!) is binary code for we (the writers) don’t have an original idea to sell to the masses and here’s our best attempt at it.  The film is all zeroes and ones – a paint by numbers kiddie project screwed up by Hollywood scorn – that doesn’t really create anything of recognizable shape.

With Theresa Palmer’s late-in-the-game arrival to help kick alien butt being the only reason to see this cynical creation from producer Michael Bay, the film suffers from a massive flat-line that happens much too soon in an uber formulaic and easy-to-write screenplay that must have even put its director asleep.  Most of the performances – even from baddie Kevin Durant and heroic Timothy Olyphant – are boring and weighted down with dialogue that sounds as if it wasn’t good enough for 1959’s campy Teenagers from Outer Space.

Unfortunately, I Am Number Four isn’t joking around.  No, humor is too good for this brooding coming-of-age romp.  It’s a serious attempt to create another witless franchise.

Fall on your knees and rejoice that they failed.

{pgomakase}

{2jtab: Film Details}

MPAA Rating: PG-13 for intense sequences of violence and action, and for language.
Director: D.J. Caruso
Writer: Alfred Gough, Miles Millar
Cast: Alex Pettyfer; Timothy Olyphant; Teresa Palmer; Dianna Agron; Callan McAuliffe; Kevin Durand
Genre: Action | Sci-Fi | Thriller
Tagline: I am number four
Memorable Movie Quote: "I play a lot of XBOX."
Distributor: Touchstone Pictures
Official Site: www.findnumberfour.com
Theatrical Release Date: February 18, 2011
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date: May 24, 2011

Synopsis: Three are dead. Who is Number Four? D.J. Caruso ("Eagle Eye," "Disturbia") helms an action-packed thriller about an extraordinary teen, John Smith (Alex Pettyfer), who is a fugitive on the run from ruthless enemies sent to destroy him. Changing his identity, moving from town to town with his guardian Henri (Timothy Olyphant), John is always the new kid with no ties to his past. In the small Ohio town he now calls home, John encounters unexpected, life-changing events—his first love (Dianna Agron), powerful new abilities and a connection to the others who share his incredible destiny.

{pgomakase}

{2jtab: Blu-ray Review}

Component Grades Movie Blu-ray Disc Blu-ray Experience

Blu-ray Review:

Available on Blu-ray - May 24, 2011
Screen Formats: 1.85:1
Subtitles: English SDH, French, Spanish
Audio: English: DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1; French: Dolby Digital 5.1; Spanish: Dolby Digital 5.1
Discs: 50GB Blu-ray Disc; Three-disc set (1 BD, 2 DVDs); Digital copy (on disc); DVD copy
Packaging: Slipcover in original pressing
Playback: Region A

Well, the 1080p/AVC-encoded transfer is certainly eye candy rocketing on the screen with a heavy amount of flames and fireballs.  Colors are crisp throughout and the black levels are consistently strong.  Everyone has a Michael Bay-sized tan across their skin and the effects are strong.  Walt Disney’s film doesn’t have much weight, but it is flashy.  Even the sound is strong, arriving on disc in a DTS-HD Master Audio 5.1 surround track that should entertain all audiences.

Supplements:

Commentary:

• None

Special Features:

There aren’t a lot and what the disc does have isn’t very thrilling for fans. The deleted scenes (six of them) are virtually only extended scenes from the movie.  Actress Teresa Palmer guides a featurette that covers the making of the movie.  Rounding out the supplemental material are bloopers that aren’t all that amusing.

• Deleted Scenes (19 min)
• Becoming Number Six (12 min)
• Bloopers (3 min)
• Trailers

{2jtab: Trailer}

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