There’s something intrinsically fun about the idea of pairing a romantic comedy with a slasher film. On paper, Heart Eyes—directed by Josh Ruben and penned by Phillip Murphy, Christopher Landon, and Michael Kennedy—seemed poised to carve out a unique niche. The premise, with its absurdly twisted “Cupid with a kink” theme, promised a bloody good time blending macabre thrills with rom-com wit. Unfortunately, the execution falters on both fronts, leaving audiences with a muddled and ultimately unsatisfying mess of a film. In simpler terms, cupid’s arrow seriously misses its mark with Heart Eyes.
Set against the Valentine’s Day holiday, a masked killer with glowing hearts for eyes stalks romantic couples, dispatching them in elaborately grotesque ways. The narrative pivots on Ally (Olivia Holt, “Kickin’ It”), and Jay (Mason Gooding, Scream) two co-workers mistaken for a couple, who must evade the homicidal Heart Eyes Killer while unraveling his twisted motives. This concept brims with potential for dark humor, thrilling sequences, and even some swoon-worthy romance, but unfortunately, Heart Eyes flounders at every step.
For a film that leans so heavily into its rom-com DNA, the pairing of Ally and Jay is shockingly flat. Their chemistry is virtually non-existent, leaving their “will-they-won’t-they” arc more tedious than tantalizing. Romantic comedies live and die by whether you care about the couple, and here, you simply don’t. Ally and Jay feel like underdeveloped archetypes—quirky female lead meets reluctant nice guy—rather than fully realized characters. We never learn much about their inner worlds or motivations, making it impossible to root for them as individuals or a pair.
Even as a slasher, Heart Eyes plays it disappointingly safe. While there are a handful of inventive kills which are worthy of its R rating, the violence lacks the visceral impact fans of the genre crave. The kills are too few and far between, and the tension dissipates as the narrative shifts into an uninspired chase sequence. What starts as a campy thrill ride devolves into a repetitive cycle of running, hiding, and narrowly escaping. The Heart Eyes Killer himself, though visually striking with those glowing heart eyes, becomes less intimidating with each encounter as the film struggles to make him more than just a gimmick. And no, moving the setting to a creaky old abandoned mansion doesn’t equate to scary.
The knockout blow comes when the killer’s identity is revealed. Instead of a jaw-dropping twist, the unmasking lands with the groan-worthy silliness of those meddling kids from a Scooby-Doo episode. The “big reveal” feels both contrived and uninspired, undermining what little suspense the film manages to generate. It’s the kind of moment that makes you question whether the filmmakers intended it to be parody or were genuinely attempting to be clever.
To its credit, the film makes an effort to be self-aware, borrowing a page from the Scream franchise’s meta playbook. Unfortunately, it doesn’t succeed in balancing that wit with meaningful commentary on either romance or horror. It occasionally winks at the audience but lacks the depth or cleverness to deliver any real critique of the genres it’s trying to blend. Instead, it ends up taking itself way too seriously—even as its premise begs for over-the-top camp—which makes the humor fall flat and the horror feel oddly lifeless.
Ultimately, Heart Eyes is an ambitious idea that’s sabotaged by poor execution. Neither Ally and Jay’s lackluster romance nor the tepid horror of the Heart Eyes Killer will leave a lasting impression. What could have been a bloody, funny romp worthy of Valentine's Day is instead a forgettable film that never finds its rhythm. If you’re a fan of either romantic comedies or slasher flicks, my advice is the same—skip this one. There are plenty of better love stories and bigger scares waiting for you elsewhere.
MPAA Rating: R.
Runtime: 97 mins
Director: Josh Ruben
Writer: Phillip Murphy; Christopher Landon; Michael Kennedy
Cast: Jordana Brewster; Olivia Holt; Devon Sawa
Genre: Romance | Horror
Tagline: Romance is Dead
Memorable Movie Quote: "Love hurts, bitch!"
Distributor: Screen Gems
Official Site:
Release Date: February 7, 2025
DVD/Blu-ray Release Date:
Synopsis: For the past several years, the "Heart Eyes Killer" has wreaked havoc on Valentine's Day by stalking and murdering romantic couples. This Valentine's Day, no couple is safe.
